https://ift.tt/Y7UGot6
I’m feeling bad for my choice so I’m here for some advice.
My two friends who were best friends before I knew them, stopped being friends because we’ll call her Josie decided to tell something personal about we’ll call her Tatum (random names) that Tatum specifically said not to tell anyone.
Josie came to me and said she felt so bad for her and I knew it was most likely the reason for Tatum and her boyfriend breaking up. I didn’t ask to know why because I didn’t want to be nosey and I knew that Tatum would most likely come to me and tell me anyways.
But Josie told me.
I was shocked that Tatum would let her tell people this information since it was very personal but she told Josie that she couldn’t tell anyone about what happened. Turns out I wasn’t the only one told, she told everyone in our group of friends and people Tatum didn’t even know.
Tatum came to me and asked to help get back with her boyfriend because she felt that she made a mistake for breaking up with him and she was sobbing so I helped, even though I was against what happened (they are happy now). When Josie was told that they got back together she was pissed. She texted her and said that, “it’s your choice but what he did isn’t right and that she shouldn’t get back with him.”
Tatum was set with getting back together with him and Josie didn’t like that. So over two mouths they stopped being friends. I was honestly shocked because they were so close. And I didn’t know what to do because I’m friends with two people that now are against each other.
And a few months later our other friend (we’ll call her Alice) also stopped being friends with Josie because she sent something to her boyfriend that she should’ve went to Alice for first (Josie wasn’t friends with her boyfriend) and that lead to another fall out. After that everyone in that friend group dropped her since they heard both Tatums and Alice’s side of the story.
I stayed friends with Josie because I had nothing against her and I still found her a good friend.
But this is where I’m having a problem.
Since Josie and me aren’t close anymore and I’m with this friend group everyday I’ve learned new things.
One: she would talk about how since I have bought things from SHE IN I’m a bad person (I’m mostly broke and I can’t afford clothes from stores, and thrifting is not much of an option since I don’t have my license and my mom won’t take me. I don’t have my own money either so my mom buys me my clothes) and I felt hurt by that because I wouldn’t think that she would say something about the person she would always call her best friend.
Two: She would never tell me the whole story, I asked Tatum and Alice about the situations that were going on with her and they told me their side of the story. Which was never mentioned when Josie would talk about it and they two showed me conversations between them.
Three: I find that Josie copies most of my interests. Which is great I’d love to have more friends with the same interests as me but when I said I liked this she’d say how it sucked but then would go on to make it her whole personality for the week. Example: I talked about how much I love Norman Reedus and she said “gross, he’s ugly” but then a week later would go on to like edits and show me stuff she bought of that had his role of Daryl Dixon on. She’s also never watched TWD (the walking dead), never played the games or read any of the comics which is fine but I find weird when she goes on about how much she loves TWD and she would go on to like everything that I had reposted about TWD. (Which is not a reason to stop being friends over, that just makes me mad because she makes me feel like my interests suck but then goes on to obsessed over it)
Four: she would embarrass me in front of other people. She would tell some of her friends some secrets that I told her and said “don’t tell anyone this please” and then decides it would be the conversation of the day.
Five: she tells her mom, boyfriend and her close friends about my personal life with my mom, my dad and my boyfriend (similar to four) I don’t have the best relationship with me dad and it’s been upsetting for many years and I’ve expressed that with Josie and she goes on to tell her mom or her boyfriend about my business. And how my mom dismisses my feelings and doesn’t stay home most nights when she has a boyfriend (which is fine, I’m old enough to be home but it just effects me when I need her help mentally) and the problems that me and my boyfriend have and our sex life. She told her mom how active I am and how I’m on birth control. That makes me very uncomfortable to the point I don’t tell her anything personal from my life.
A month ago she got into a big fight with the group and decides to call them out online, calling them bad friends and just making herself the victim all together when she has her faults in these falling outs. She came to me and basically said “whose side are you on?” I said I’m not picking any since none of this is my business and that I don’t want to get in the middle of this because I don’t want to lose more friends. I’ve already lost friends because of decisions I’ve made and that’s my fault. But I don’t want more people to hate me.
She seemed to not like that and just stopped texting me all together. And when she did that I felt hurt because I’m not picking someone’s side she just stopped texting me. So this made me go more onto Tatums and Alice’s side. And made me closer with the group since it seemed like I lost her as a friend all together.
She still posts about how she’s the victim in the situation and that how this friend group made it hard for her to make friends, which makes me feel awful but she’s not being a good friend since I’m still friends with this group and I’m not on a side.
Little note: I was also friends with Tatum before I was with Josie and Tatum didn’t make me feel bad for still being friends with Josie after their fall out. But Josie went on saying “I’m not saying you should stop being friends with Tatum because I can’t decide that but” then goes on talking bad about Tatum when Tatum avoided talking bad about Josie even after the messy fallout because again Josie made herself out to be the victim.
So AITAH for taking my friend’s side over my other?
https://ift.tt/xcP41NL Tuned For Everything Norman We Don't Mess Around when it comes to things pertaining to the man.
